In comedy, people like to give feedback.
Your comeback wasn’t good. You should have said [my funny idea] instead.
All of your characters are the same.
You’re not funny.
In comedy, people are not good at giving feedback.
Hey, I shouldn’t be so rude to my fellow comedians. Software engineers are not good at giving feedback either.
We like to put people down. Our egos feel good about it. Yeah, it’s nice to be superior to someone, if only for a moment.
At PyCon AU, I saw a great talk by Maia Sauren. She suggested that feedback should always have two of the three qualities:
(I’ve definitely failed this test… many times.)
The next time you’re giving feedback, pause and think, did you tick at least two of these boxes? Or are you only providing “feedback” to put someone down and feel better about yourself?